by The Truth About Masturbation and Premature Ejaculation
Nobody wants to admit it, but premature ejaculation is common among men. While it is one of the most common sexual complaints, in many cases it is not an ongoing condition that is worthy of treatment. Premature ejaculation is generally defined as the inability to control orgasm, resulting in an early release of semen within a minute or so of sexual activity.
While most men may occasionally experience this condition, for many men, premature ejaculation occurs frequently, if not during every sexual encounter. For these men, this is a chronic condition that requires treatment. There are medical treatments and behavioral therapies that can be used to address premature ejaculation. It is a good idea to discuss the issue with your doctor, who may be able to help identify the underlying cause of the condition and possible treatments that are suitable for you.
The Truth About Masturbation
For some men, learning to change their behavior during sex can help treat premature ejaculation. In fact, there is evidence that men who suffer from premature ejaculation have successfully learned to delay their orgasm through controlled masturbation. It’s a belief by some that masturbating before sex can make you last longer. Dr. Rachel Rubin offers some medical insight on whether there’s any truth to this idea.
The practice of controlled masturbation is designed to teach men how to take control of the timing of their orgasm, to become accustomed to the sensations prior to climax and to learn when and how to reduce stimulation to delay ejaculation. This technique is designed to change behavior, unlearn practices, and to change the body’s reaction to stimulation of the penis. It can be easy to become frustrated or to believe the goal of the technique is to assume complete control of when you ejaculate. But this is not realistic.
How Does Controlled Masturbation Work?
The first step to practicing controlled masturbation is to strive for incremental improvements in the amount of time you can delay ejaculation. Gradual improvements over time with consistent results are good signs of progress. Even though there may be occasional times when you ejaculate earlier than you would like while practicing controlled masturbation, do not become frustrated. Continue to practice the technique, delaying orgasm for as long as possible, and look for gradual increases in time in how long it takes to climax.
Step 1
Start the technique by masturbating without any lubrication. The use of lubrication can often accelerate the male orgasm during masturbation and makes it more difficult to control climax. As those sensations of pleasure intensify during masturbation and there is a sense that ejaculation is near, stop masturbating. This is often referred to as “edging,” when you masturbate just to the point of climax and stop to delay ejaculation.
Some men find it helpful when starting this technique to use their thumb and forefinger to squeeze the base of their penis tightly and just under the head of the penis along the shaft to delay ejaculation and reduce the pleasurable sensation. Do not continue masturbating until the urge to ejaculate subsides. Once the urge is gone, continue masturbating and repeat this cycle several times, maintaining awareness of how long you are able to delay ejaculation.
Continue this method for as many times as possible, ultimately allowing yourself to orgasm. Focus on the pleasurable sensations prior to climax and the feeling of losing those sensations when you stop masturbating. This teaches you how to recognize the sensation of when an orgasm is near and what it feels like to stop and resume stimulating the penis. Practice this technique several times a week, continuing to extend the amount of time you delay ejaculation.
Step 2
As you become accustomed to the sensations before orgasm and the practice of discontinuing stimulation of the penis, begin alternating how you stimulate the penis during masturbation. This will teach you to become more aware of how different types of stimulation affect your penis. It is important to continue masturbating at this time without lubrication as a way to reduce overstimulation.
Instead of stopping stimulation altogether of the penis when you feel the sensation of an orgasm approaching, change the method of stimulation you use during masturbation. For example, slow down how to fast you stroke your penis during masturbation or reduce the tightness of your grip during masturbation. You could even try using the other hand that is not customarily used during masturbation. The goal of this step is to maintain your arousal and erection, while controlling when you ejaculate without necessarily stopping completely to avoid orgasm. Repeat this method several times a week, striving to increase the amount of time it takes to climax.
Step 3
As you continue to learn the sensations produced by this technique and progress in increasing the amount of time it takes to ejaculate, you can gradually add lubrication. The introduction of lubrication helps to create the normal sensation that is felt in sexual activity with a partner. Continue this method, practicing several times a week as you continue to strive to increase the amount of time it takes to orgasm.
Step 4
Once you have successfully learned how to delay ejaculation during masturbation, begin to introduce these techniques during sex with a partner. Remember the basic principles learned during the controlled masturbation technique. Stay aware of the sensations that you recognize as orgasm nears. Stop intercourse before you ejaculate, and you can even withdraw your penis entirely. As the urge to climax subsides, continue with intercourse, but remember to stop moving if the urge to climax returns. Remember, some men find it helpful to squeeze the base of the penis or near the head to reduce the desire to ejaculate.
When resuming intercourse, move slowly as you learn to understand the sensations that suggest an orgasm is approaching. Repeat the exercise of starting and stopping several times, with the goal of extending how long it takes to ejaculate.
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